How do I act?

[Cautious]

I agree with the above. It is cake eating. I stand firm on my position that he wants to go on the cruise to prevent you from meeting someone else who IS interested in you. He may not outwardly say so, but I think that's where his mind went. "Oh no, if I don't go with her, she's going to find someone else." Only he wants to be the one to find someone else first. Seems like he's using you until he can make a firm plan to be with OW, IMO.

The backslide isn't a big deal if you don't let it be one. If you want to continue on the path to saving your marriage, you have to learn to bite your tongue and not talk about the R until your H is ready. That's where doing things for yourself comes in. You need time to process the anger you're feeling from the way he's talking to you/treating you without taking that negativity out on him. If you need to go to the gym and pound on a punching bag, do it. You want to show him a calm exterior and detatch from the hurtful words he's saying to you.