Mike...I'm sorry, but with respect to what you wish to do in your marriage; I think giving her a free pass to go have sex with another man is not justified even if you emotionally abused and neglected her. Ask any WAW and they'll probably all believe that they were neglected and emotionally abused in some fashion and they probably have been. But I will never believe that having an A is the proper response to that.
Counseling and changing behaviors within the marriage better protect the M. Allowing someone to have sex within the M is allowing them to become a swinger. It will destabilize and erode your M even further.
She will have a taste of this OM and, very likely, will want him again. What will be your move when she comes to you and says that she needs another weekend with him for "just" sex and we'll REALLY work on our marriage after I get back this time?
