If you want her to feel like you are a warmer person which is what it sounds like your objective is, then compliment something around the house or someone ELSE.
You don't have to rave about HER for her to realise you are warming up.
OR, you insert the compliment in a sentence indirectly.
Your wife is going to be "shy" around you until this is resolved, I don't know why you are even surprised at that one.
You need to stop the pursuit, every time you do that you set yourself back and drive her away.
Rather than you being FRUSTRATED that she's shy why not try RESPECTING that like an adult and turning AROUND until she's clothed and such? Isn't that how an adult handles that?
During her affair my wife was like that as well, I just got up, smiled warmly, and said "I will give you some privacy so you can change..."
I suspect you aren't sending the right energy in the room when she's "shy" right now. You will need to fix that.
If your wife rolls her eyes when you compliment her STOP COMPLIMENTING her.
MWD makes it VERY clear in the book that if a 180 is NOT getting the response you expected then STOP THE 180 immediatley.
Rather than worrying about it being a SIN you should try to respect her need for space.
If you are frustrated by this she's going to pick up on that.
A lot of people here have their partners actually having SEX with other people during all of this... YOU don't... you should be able to dance through this comparatively.
1. If your wife rolls her eyes, she wants you to STOP it. 2. If your wife acts "shy" then leave the room or turn around and give her some privacy.
This is basic stuff. You need to find a way to show your wife you are improving WITHOUT CHASING HER. You havn'et found that safety zone yet.
