W was acting (more) cold and (more) distant over the weekend. The term I use to describe her these days is 'emotionally erratic'. I work hard to act 'as if' and I think it drives her nuts. Again, we had a nice weekend (relatively) and I just acted as if nothing was wrong.
She dropped a new bomb monday morning before I left town - she said she wanted me to print out divorce papers for her. I had found that you can print your own paperwork online free, and had told her if she wanted a D we should go that route and save money on the mediator for initial filing. However, I made it clear as I stated above that I would not be the one to file, but that if she wanted to I would at least print the paperwork for her to save $$. So, I printed the papers and gave them to her.
The only dispute we had left when we left off with the mediation was on the kids schedule. She wanted them to switch houses every night for 4 nights a week. I told her that they should spend a week at a time with each parent since our youngest is 11.5 now. She would never consider this before. I told her that my suggestion is best for the kids, but if she didn't agree we should get their opinion if it comes time to decide. She then backed off and said OK on the week-long stay, but that she still wanted to pick them up from school the days I am at work and spend time with them before I am home. OK with me for now and probably best for the kids overall. So, there isn't much left we would have to agree on or discuss, unless she decides to get greedy and re-discuss the assumptions around how much she works and earns.
We will see what she does now that she can easily file for D without hiring a L. I don't feel like I am pushing her to file by printing the papers for her, just saving lots of lawyer fees for the initial filing. I am just giving her what she needs but she can make the decision.
I think OM is throwing ultimatums at her possibly.
It will be interesting to see what she does. When I get back home later this week it is back to 'as if'. I did some mini-pursuing, telling her that all of this turmoil over deciding where the kids would spend their time if we D is all by her choice - she could have made a different choice and all these issues would go away. I told her I am still willing to work on it - no response from her but I didn't expect one. I was just trying to leave the door open.
ME/XW:47 S21, D19, S15, S14 M:21 T:26 W moved 6/10 I filed 7/10 D final 4/12 remarried 8/12 W wants to R 12/10 and 4/11 but I decline
