So, I have a question...wondering if I should invite H to Easter dinner? My DIL's parents have invited the kids and I to their house for an egg hunt and dinner which sounds like a lot of fun! Her family is great! On the other hand, Easter is a chance to connect/family time with H. But, making our own plans is doing a 180 and galing and acting as if etc...I just know my DB coach would encourage using Easter as a time to connect with H but I am just not sure H cares at this time...any opinions welcome!
M48 H53 M16 T18 S16 D13 SS30 H drops bomb PA/8-30-09 H leaves 12-30-09 D filed by H 2-10 H asks to come home 4-11 Piecing
Hi MF! Busch Light was VERY good after a busy day at work!!! Am sure H would be welcome to DIL parent's house but since he didn't bother showing for grandson's bday party (left gift and card in door), trying not to mind read here, pretty sure that he would not go...we could always invite him and let him make the decison!
Thanks for the congrats on S14! It was touch and go with his grades so glad they are good enough for him to participate!
M48 H53 M16 T18 S16 D13 SS30 H drops bomb PA/8-30-09 H leaves 12-30-09 D filed by H 2-10 H asks to come home 4-11 Piecing
I would invite him if you won't be crushed if he says no. I've read posts from a WAH/MLC guy (happy_again) who said it meant a lot to him to be included in family activities.
me: 42 | STBXH: 41 | T: 18 | M: 10 | separation: Jan 3, 2010 | they deserve better: S7 & D4 current thread: http://tinyurl.com/3y8sxcp .: first breathe, then heal, then start LIVING :.
Thanks FM! I will try and find happy_again's thread!
I think I am to the point where I could invite H and be ok if he said no...I don't like like saying that but that is where I am at!
I just don't know what is best. He has filed a D. It is only a piece of paper...he is still loved by his family...and he would be welcome here or even at DIL's parents...
Also, this weekend, H's nephew gets his Eagle Scout. We are invited, H got a seperate invite. SIL has reserved rooms and really wants us to come. Am sure H won't as he will have to work at midnight Sunday. I am thankful that H's family still wants me around and am truly thinking of heading over that way (4 hrs) after the honor band thing but it will feel weird going to H's family function without him!
M48 H53 M16 T18 S16 D13 SS30 H drops bomb PA/8-30-09 H leaves 12-30-09 D filed by H 2-10 H asks to come home 4-11 Piecing
I too am conflicted with the impending Palm Sunday/Easter plans. I have NOT spoken to W yet about plans for either, and I have my own feelings about what would be OK or not, and whether I would be comfortable. As with a lot of this MLC fallout involving families - there are no rules and no guidelines. This is my first walk into the tepid waters after the LS filing, so I'll be watching the comments here too. If nothing else, I will take my girls to church both Sundays so I spend time with them, but unsure what the rest of those days will entail.....
Me: 48 W: 47 M: 25 years T: 30 years S24, D21, D11 Bomb dropped: "Not in love with you" 10/09 Separated Feb 2010
Tom...I really think you should move your thread over here to MLC. You are doing very well but think you would get some really good advice on stuff like that! Even though I have not gotten much a response to my last question...lol! Do you and your W have any kind of visitation agreement?
I am thinking that if H does not spend time with the kids Easter weekend, then I will accept the invite from DIL's parents and leave him on his own. We cannot keep "holding out" for him!
M48 H53 M16 T18 S16 D13 SS30 H drops bomb PA/8-30-09 H leaves 12-30-09 D filed by H 2-10 H asks to come home 4-11 Piecing
I wasn't even thinking about inviting my WH over for Easter. I did invite him for Thanksgiving but that was when he was still back & forth. For all I know he may have plans with OW.
Originally Posted By: confusedwife
I am thinking that if H does not spend time with the kids Easter weekend, then I will accept the invite from DIL's parents and leave him on his own. We cannot keep "holding out" for him!
I know that you would want him to be there for the kids, so they have both mom and dad together for the holiday. But it's as you say "we cannot keep holding out for him".
Last edited by Mila; 03/25/1006:11 AM.
M53 H54 D17 M33Y T38Y Bomb OW 09/09 OUT 10/09 BACK 11/09 OUT 01/10 WANTS TO R 04/10 BACK with OW 05/10 Wants to Reconcile 05/11 I said NO
So, I have a question...wondering if I should invite H to Easter dinner?
When you ask a question that there is no right answer to sometimes you don't always get a response. Or you need to repeat it because we all get busy with other things.
The answer by the way is you should do what YOU want to do. If you want to invite him, fine, Just have no expectations of anything. He might not show up.
Or go to DIL. Would she invite WH to her event, then you are off the hook.
