I have to tell you, though, that you really need to spend some time and learn something from this experience. You left your XW when she was at her most vulnerable, you reconsidered and did everything to try and win her back, but you never really seemed willing to accept that you'd tremendously hurt her. You seemed more focused on yourself and why she wasn't meeting your needs.
Given that you'd abandoned her and she had to take care of your child alone, it's no surprise to me that you'd have to do backbends to get back in her good graces. But you did that. Unfortunately, there was that next wall - your expectations and the finances. Those are always going to be there. You either handle it, or you don't. It seems like you didn't do so well. That's where communication skills come in to play, but I never had the feeling that you two were communicating.
Of course I don't know the exact dynamics. But I have to say that I'm a bit more on your XW's side on this one. If I were in her shoes, I wouldn't give you the time of day. Maybe an unnecessary 2x4, but I'm being honest. I think you'd do well to get some counseling, to re-examine your values, learn some communication skills, and mature a bit. It may be that you were never suited to be with your XW, but the way this sitch has played out, as recorded through your posts, seems a bit ... unnecessary.
Good luck. I hope you find what you're looking for. As I've done before, I encourage you to read your name, "Love no matter what," and think about what that means.
