You have to trust me on this...she IS having an affair. When I accessed my W's email accounts I was blown away. Hundreds of pages of love notes and cybersex. You're probably right, she will screw up at some point, but it may be too late. For what, I don't know.
Oh and what is too extreme about tapping into her computer? She is totally disrupting your life and lying to your face MICrazy
I took it a step further and bought CheckMate. Not a fun night when I used it to test, but it confirmed what I already thought I knew. Shock