My w just sent me another email. my best friend had called and spoke to her last week. She emailed me this:
Look. I know that you have spoken to friend and he has probably told you a lot of his opinion of how the conversation went. One thing is for certain that he said. I am angry. I have been angry for a long time. We have a lot of issues that have to be addressed. I don't know when a good time to address those issues will be. I do know that I am very unhappy and have been for a while. I am unhappy with myself and with you.
This was my response:
friend has said very little to me, nor have I asked. That conversation was between you and him, it wasn't for me I understand how you feel. We will address those issues when we are ready to do so. You have my full cooperation on anything and everything.
How was my response? Do you think the reality of me coming home is starting to hit her?
that last line was a little much but I liked the overall tone of your message, you were direct, didn't back down, instead of saying "I understand how you feel" because honestly you don't, you can say "I understand that this might make you feel uncomfortable". I liked the part that you told her that you would address the issues when you're ready - you weren't pushing for a discussion as soon as you got off the plane, you weren't sucking up to her, you were being direct and saying it like it is and that they need to be discussed.
