It's good that he opened up to you, but it sounds like he is in the exact same confused, depressed, flip-flopping place. Did you read the depression section of the DR book or any other resources about depression? There's not much you can do until they decide to seek help. And if he uses "deciding about marriage" as a way to avoid dealing with all his problems for a year before seeking help, you will hear a lot of these converations. It's interesting that he bought a lot of stuff and tried a bunch of new activities before EA looking for a magic bullet for his unhappiness. My IC told me I can't fix it and to be careful not to let anyone get me stuck in the fix-it or therapist role. I guess she thought I should only be a listening ear and a helping hand so much if H will not seek effective help. I wasn't sure what to say about that.
