Stress A lecturer, when explaining stress management to an audience, raised a glass of water and asked, 'How heavy is this glass of water?'
Answers called out ranged from 20g to 500g.
The lecturer replied, 'The absolute weight doesn't matter. It depends on how long you try to hold it. If I hold it for a minute, it's not a problem.. If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my right arm. If I hold it for a day, you'll have to call an ambulance. In each case, it's the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.'
He continued, 'And that's the way it is with stress management. If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, the burden will become increasingly heavy: and we won't be able to carry on. '
'As with the glass of water, you have to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again.. When we're refreshed, we can carry on with the burden. So, before you return home tonight, put the burden of work down: don't carry it home. You can pick it up tomorrow. Whatever burdens you're carrying now, let them down for a moment if you can.'
So, my friend, Put down anything that may be a burden to you right now. Don't pick it up again until after you've rested a while.
Here are some great ways of dealing with the burdens of life:
* Just accept that, some days, you're the pigeon: and, some days, you're the statue.
* Always keep your words soft and sweet - , just in case you have to eat them.
* Always wear stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.
*Drive carefully. It's not only cars that can be "recalled" by their maker.
* If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
* If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, It was probably worth it.
* It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to be kind to others.
* Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time, because then you won't have a leg to stand on.
* Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.
* Since it's the early worm that gets eaten by the bird, sleep late.
* The second mouse gets the cheese.
* When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
* Birthdays are good for you. The more you have, the longer you live.
* You may be only one person in the world, But you may also be the world to one person.
* Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once.
* We could learn a lot from crayons... Some are sharp; some are pretty; and some are dull. Some have weird names; and all are different colours; but they all have to live in the same box.
*A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.
Have an awesome day and know that someone has thought about you today...I did...
Me 48 X's vary S 27 S 18 Back with high school sweety after 30 years..
A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in their bed.
She puts on her dressing gown and goes downstairs to look for him.
She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a hot cup of coffee in front of him. He appears to be in deep thought, just staring at the wall.
She watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of his coffee.
'What's the matter, dear?' she whispers as she steps into the room, 'Why are you down here at this time of night?'
The husband looks up from his coffee, 'I am just remembering when we first met 20 years ago and started dating. You were only 16. Do you remember back then?' he says solemnly.
The wife is touched to tears thinking that her husband is so caring, so sensitive.
'Yes, I do' she replies.
The husband pauses. The words were not coming easily.
'Do you remember when your father caught us in the back seat of my car?'
'Yes, I remember!' said the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him.
The husband continues. 'Do you remember when he shoved the shotgun in my face and said, 'Either you marry my daughter, or I will send you to jail for 20 years?'
'I remember that too' she replies softly.
He wipes another tear from his cheek and says...
'I would have been released today.'
Me 48 X's vary S 27 S 18 Back with high school sweety after 30 years..
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
This one I caught in the SGV Tribune the other day and called the Editorial Room and asked who wrote this. It took two or three readings before the editor realized that what he was reading was impossible!!! They put in a correction the next day. I just couldn't help but sending this along. Too funny.
Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
No crap, really? Ya think? ---------------------------------------------------------------------- ------
Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
Now that's taking things a bit far! -----------------------------------------------------------
Panda MatingFails; Veterinarian Takes Over
What a guy! --------------------------------------------------------------- < /SPAN>
See if that works any better than a fair trial! ----------------------------------------------------------
War Dims Hope for Peace
I can see where it might have that effect! ----------------------------------------------------------------
If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
Ya think?! ---------------------------------------------------------------------- -
Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
Who would have thought! ----------------------------------------------------------------
Enfield ( London ) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
They may be on to something! ---------------------------------------------------------------------- --
Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
You mean there's something stronger than duct tape? ----------------------------------------------------------
Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge
He probably IS the battery charge! ----------------------------------------------
New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
Weren't they fat enough?! -----------------------------------------------</ B>
Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
That's what he gets for eating those beans! -------------------------------------------------
Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
Do they taste like chicken? ****************************************
Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
Chainsaw Massacre all over again! ***************************************************
Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
Boy, are they tall! *****************************************< FONT color=#0000bf size=2 face="Bookman Old Style">
And the winner is....
Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
Did I read that right? ***************************************************
Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even a chuckle). We all need a good laugh, at least once a day!
Me 48 X's vary S 27 S 18 Back with high school sweety after 30 years..
1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.
2 You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.
4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.
5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses..
6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.
7 Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen.
8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it.
10. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your coffee.
11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. : )
12 You're reading this and nodding and laughing.
13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this message.
14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.
15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9 on this list
AND NOW YOU ARE LAUGHING at yourself.
Go on, forward this to your friends. You know you want to.
Me 48 X's vary S 27 S 18 Back with high school sweety after 30 years..
"Of course I won't laugh," said the nurse. "I'm a professional. In over twenty years I've never laughed at a patient."
"Okay then," said Fred, and he proceeded to drop his trousers, revealing the tiniest 'man thingy' the nurse had ever seen. Length and width, it couldn't have been bigger than a AAA battery. Unable to control herself, the nurse started giggling, then fell to the floor laughing. Ten minutes later she was able to struggle to her feet and regain her composure.
"I am so sorry," she said. "I don't know what came over me. On my honor as a nurse and a lady, I promise it won't happen again. Now, tell me, what seems to be the problem?"
"It's swollen," Fred replied.
She ran out of the room.
Me 48 X's vary S 27 S 18 Back with high school sweety after 30 years..
