It does indeed suck and hurt. And the pain will not be over quick like pulling a band aid off.
I do hope that the parenting time/custody issues could be dealt with before and independently of financial things like alimony. The kids come first. The one thing I am so grateful for was to get a parenting plan in place legally before we started the battle over financials.
Pick your battles carefully. Treat anything financial as a business deal and the L's can help by providing an emotional buffer. You may not think it possible now, but your M still has a chance.
In regards to alimony, I even had a thread with the name "Alimony is like buying oats for a dead horse". But my situation was different in that my W was living with a rich sugar daddy (who she married) and was trying to get substantial spousal support. I ended up buying her out ($40 G) of alimony which I refinanced the house to pay off.
