Is this piecing?

[flowmom]

H4L, your H's addiction issue is a HUGE thing! A father who I know struggled with that one in a big way (has a wife and 3 children) and he made it through the other side with a lot of support from his wife, friends, and Narcotics Anonymous. I hope that your H has the strength to deal with this...

I'm so glad that you have an answer to what the heck is up with your H. It really sucks that he couldn't have owned up to this a long time ago.

I see the logic of following Gno's advice to keep status quo in your interactions with H for the next 4 weeks. Whether it's the legal separation or the new things you are trying, things have gotten really stirred up and now time is needed for things to settle.

But you also need to really work on self care too. You need to be sure that you are safeguarding your emotional safety.