How do I act?

[Surviving03]

well guys... i think i am giving up.... there is an EA, i did some snooping and found some emails between him and a girl he was deployed with... seems like its in the initial flirty phase, but still incrediby hurtful... when i asked him about it, he of course tried to play it off like it was nothing... we talked for hours yesterday... cried alot on both of our parts... but he still seems like he wants me to leave... we hugged, he kissed me on the forehead, but still insists on sleeping on the couch...he said some pretty hurtful things about me to this OW... he told me things like he is in it 100% to try.... told her its awkward and he has to go out to smoke a cigarette and think about her.... told me if we can make it work and be happy thats all he wants.... told her that he is only staying in this house til Monday and then is going to tell his work he wants a dorm.... and of course down played this all when i asked him.... I told him that I am going home, that I cant trust him and if he would stop writing her and agreed to take me home with him when he goes to visit then i would stay... he agreed to stop writing her (for now) but has not agreed to take me home (part of his trip home includes going to see her) so i guess i have no choice but to go.... he made alot of jokes today about sex with him... but i feel like he is just toying with me... i CANNOT believe this has happened... this girl ought to be ashamed of herself and so should he...