New here but have been a voyeur

[nicole8]

I do actually think those are some positive steps forward.... It does seem that the week has been a total roller coaster for you. He seems to be making an effort though.

I've asked myself the same questions you asked above:

"Can people actually reconnect after something like this? Obviously, with the A, our physical separation, poor communication, fights, no intimacy...we do not share a connection or closeness right now. Is this normal? or does it just mean that it is over? If we aren't experiencing those feelings now..will they never return? When people fall out of love..can they fall back in love?"

I don't know what the answer to any of this is. I am so fed up with my husbands immaturity. He has done nothing buy avoid responsibility, our realtionship and blame me for everything. He is apparently not to blame for anything. His mood swings are so irratic. I find it hard to "win" when he comes here and is cranky, moody and irritable with everything that I do (because everthing I have done is wrong or will be wrong). How can I compete with this when everything he does with the OW is probably fun and then he thinks of me as the one who brings stress to him.

Sorry, venting....feels good and I don't think I helped you at all except that I do have the same questions as you. I don't even know what to say to my husband. I am afraid to talk with him about ANYTHING because I think he has given up and doesn't think there is any hope. He believes that he never loved me and that his life will be better if he is divorced. Ohh, and it has nothing to do with the OW because there is no OW. Right. I am not an idiot but apparently he thinks I am.

Good luck to you lolawar. It looks like you have alot to think about and I will be thinking of you and hoping that you find the way that is the best for you.