OK here's an update: My wife got a part time job this week. She is making a little money now and I think she wants to get her own cell phone. She has been taking my cell phone with her "for emergencies" but I know that she used it to talk to the OM both yesterday and the day before. If I keep it from her, she gets very mad at me and says I am not her father.
Yesterday evening, she went shopping with me but refused to hold my hand. I went to church with the kids this morning and my wife stayed home and cooked lunch. She also talked to the OM by phone while I was gone. (He stays home from church too now.) I don't have recordings of any of the recent conversations. I also know that the OM send her a message today on her Facebook saying, "This is really hard for me but I think you will be better off if you forget about me." Not sure what prompted that, but I hope he's serious.
My wife said this evening that she had a headache and wanted to get out for awhile, so she left. Before she left, she begged me for the cell phone. I was very reluctant to give it too her but I wanted to avoid problems and I said to her, "Promise me that you won't call him (the OM)." She said she wouldn't and I gave it too her. To the best of my knowledge, she hasn't seen the OM for awhile although I can't be 100% sure. She likes to go off to a park to see the sunset by herself occasionally. Of course it's possible that she will talk to the OM on the phone, but it will be recorded this time if she does.
My wife is asking for a divorce and I don't completely understand why.