flowmom | need to commit to myself

[Gardener]

fm, I'm behind and doing some catching up. I am still working/reading the "Shattered" section of Andrson's TJFATH. While I don't "skim ahead," I do see that stage three is Internalizing the Rejection. Having not read it I assume at this point it refers to the "Spouse abandoned me, so there must be something wrong/lacking/failing/terrible in me!" victimhood.

I won't rush, because the book takes time, thought, reflection and work, but I can't wait to get to that section, that stage. I believe that has been my biggest problem: I became stuck - mired - in that stage, that feeling, that dysfunctional thinking for way too long.

And to be perfectly honest, I think I'm still there in many ways.

We'll see when I get there.