flowmom | need to commit to myself

[Gardener]

rr22, I'm behind and have been catching up with flowmom and I gotta tell you: This is a great post! Right on the money!

I have the never even looked or thought about another since met H problem too. I'm not sure that it WILL go away actually. I don't know if it goes away for everyone. I have met women and men who, post-D, say they are "done" for life and are living that reality. And no, they don't necessarily have "issues." I think people should be realistic and that how great divorce is books and individual therapists give people the idea that they DEFINITELY will meet their LIFELOVE around the corner. No. Reality doesn't bear that out. You only have some percentage chance of that. What divorcing people need to be accepting is the 50/50 chance that they will be single and figure out how to be happy with that.

My thoughts and feelings exactly. And where I am (right now), for me I would change the last line to:

"What divorcing people need to be accepting is the 50/50 chance that they will be single and figure out how to be happy with that." For me, that is both my starting point and my goal...before anything else.

Thanks, again for a great, cogent post.