Need a Plan for My Marriage

[LSG]

There is so much more I wanted to say. I am so annoyed by her. I have such contempt for the woman that I still love. I hate to feel this way! It just sucks so bad, and it seems so wrong. I know this is the way it is for many here, and I do not want to have this M continue this way. I do not plan to divorce, so I guess I have to do what I can to end this BS as soon as possible. I cannot wait to do more next week. She did seem ready for divorce when I said what I said. I do not remember exactly what she said because I was so angry. I guess I just blocked it out. I know I should not get mad, but I could not help it.


She is such a terrible person right now. I know I need the job, I need to man up, but what I really need is good sound advice to restore a good positive M.

We will see how this all plays out. I know I am making mistakes, so keep me on the right path.

[LSG]

This is just driving me crazy the way things are in my life and marriage, and I do not know how to change things for myself and life and my current situation. I try so hard to make the right decision for myself, my life, and my family. It seems to go further away from me. I do not want to have my marriage end. I know fighting with my wife about going with her and the kids to this company event was so wrong. I know that the OM will probably be there, and I do not want my kids near him, and I know there is little I can do to stop it. The harder I fight against it, the more it makes it worse, so I stopped the fighting. I do not know how to put boundaries that will work if she does not care what I think. I know everyone has told me that it is my fault for the affair, and I know it partially is. I want nothing more than to change things, but it seems to end the wrong way. I am just getting out my frustrations I suppose.

[LSG]

Wife left for the first time with kids by herself on a day trip with out me. It just feels so wrong on so many levels. I am just so disappointed by the recent turn of events. It seems that we grow further apart, and I don't know how to stop it. There is probably nothing I can do to stop it at this point. I truly feel so detached at this point. It seems nothing I have been doing is working. I did say bye to the kids before they left. She said "bye", and I said "bye" back, but I was really at the point where I could not care less about her even when I still do. I guess that is why I am here, because I do still do care. I know I need to worry about myself too, and I hope will concentrate more on that, but I just am not able to yet.

[Steve McQueen]

I need support because I certainly do not get that at home, and that is why I am here to do the best I can to be better and keep my family intact. With help from you guys I know I can do that. I have not given up, and I will not. I do not plan to continue the way it has been.

Keep the strong positive advice coming, please. I need that right now!

you spend waaaaaaaaay toooooooo muuuuuuuch time thinking about the affair and contacting the omw. start thinking about something more important...YOU!

Wife left for the first time with kids by herself on a day trip with out me. It just feels so wrong on so many levels. I am just so disappointed by the recent turn of events. It seems that we grow further apart, and I don't know how to stop it.

go to the gym or the track and run some laps. then i'd go to the mall and spend some of my wife's money on some new summer clothes. maybe then to the olive garden for a bottemless salad and breadsticks and a few of them fruity sweet sissy drinks....

its SPRING man. spring.

[LSG]

Hi Steve,

You are probably right, but it is constantly there.

He may be at this event for her work, and I do not want my kids around this sleazy jerk. His wife cheated on him, and now he is going to go after my wife. I want to protect my kids and family. I just don't get people that cheat, and that is probably why my marriage is doomed. I know this is probably why I think about my situation and what is happening more than I should.

I really know you are trying to help me, and I really do appreciate the kind words today. You are really making me think about things right now, and for that I am grateful.

Thank you!!! I mean that!

[luvless]

Hey LSG - are you in the alt?

[LSG]

What is "alt"?

[LSG]

I am trying to set boundaries, so I cancelled both phones text messaging features, so she cannot text the OM anymore. It would just make me sick seeing his number on the phone log. I should have done that sooner. It felt so good to do. If there is just one call from him on her cell phone, I will start to block that too. She cannot bring this affair to the house. The kiddies and I need some relief from this. My son says "he hates the way our family is not, and he wishes it was like it was." A four old should feel like this. He should not have to deal with this everyday. He needs to have no care in the world. My daughter hates what her mother is doing. She does not like this, and does not want her mother to continue to put him before her and us.

I am going to do my best to protect them and keep this affair as far away from home as possible. It needs to be done now. I am going to hit each problem one at time.

I let her know there will be consequences for her actions, and that I would not in an open marriage anymore. I acted today, and I will continue to do so. I know there will be a backlash, and I will have to live with that. Oh, will. There is not much she can do to hurt than she already has.

[Greek]

I am trying to set boundaries, so I cancelled both phones text messaging features, so she cannot text the OM anymore. It would just make me sick seeing his number on the phone log. I should have done that sooner. It felt so good to do. If there is just one call from him on her cell phone, I will start to block that too. She cannot bring this affair to the house. The kiddies and I need some relief from this. My son says "he hates the way our family is not, and he wishes it was like it was." A four old should feel like this. He should not have to deal with this everyday. He needs to have no care in the world. My daughter hates what her mother is doing. She does not like this, and does not want her mother to continue to put him before her and us.

How do they KNOW what is going on?


Greek

[LSG]

Because she tried to take them shopping with him, and I stopped it when I first found out about it. I had not faced this type of problem before, and I reacted in front of the kids. She also was telling my kids about him before that even happened my daughter told me later.

Now, my daughter comments when she comes home late that she is probably with him.