Looking for help with WAW

[mza8]

Sandi, if you're out there I could use another 2x4.

I don't know what I'm doing wrong or what I can do better. It's been 5 months and my W doesn't seem to be budging. I think I've done a pretty good job giving her space. When we do communicate I am cheerful. I have been argeeing with her with plans to sell the house. I validate the rare times she brings up anything with the M. I'm not argumentative when she says something I disagree with, be it the house, financials or R talk. Definitely a 180 for me.

For myself I have my new job. Starting my second job. Still staying bust GAL. Exercise regularly, go to church, read books, try to stay positive, etc. I continue to do all of the things I should have done in my M. I've been busting my butt fixing up this house. Yes, a part of me would have loved for my W to move back in (even if it was just her for now to give her time for her), but the work is also so that we can sell the house.

The past week has been wonderful and sad. Wonderful because I've been back in my house fixing it up. I miss being here. It's sad though because everything is so familiar. Talking to my neighbors, listening to the birds in the back yard, etc. The weather has been great and I keep thinking how my W and I would always grill when the weather was nice. Makes me sad to think that part of my life is over.

My W has done absolutely nothing to help with the house. Sometimes it upsets me, makes me not want to do any more work on the house. But I feel lile I have to do the right thing here and be responsible. So I'm ok that I'm the only one doing the work. Makes me feel good doing the work.

Sometimes I feel like telling my W how I feel. Tell her how I'm not happy with the entire way she is acting. But what good would that do? Probably only make matters worse. It upsets me when my W and I argued last week and she said how she could have taken all of the furniture and money but didn't. Ok, was I supposed to be grateful? I feel asking her why she would have done that to me anyway? What would I have done to deserve it? (she didn't do those things, she just said she could have) I keep telling myself that perhaps once the house is sold and that stress if off my W, that maybe she will come around to the idea of saving our M. IDK... Her father told me that one time, that she is so stressed about the house that I needed to sell it so my W could relax.

I have a C appt. next week with my new C. I keep wondering if I should tell my W if she wants to go that she is welcome and just leave it at that, no pressure. I don't want to push her. I've had plenty of people tell me to give her space. Should I continue with this backing off? It's been 5 months so I guess not a long time. Question for me is, if not now then when do I try with W? I know she will probably get her own apartment soon and move out of her sister's house. Part of me is afraid that once she gets an apartment, it will make it much more difficult for us to reconcile.

Feel like I'm being a better man but W doesn't seem to notice. Sandi, I could use your help again.