Will I ever be forgiven???

[dday101798]

Here is my post from the day after the "initial talk"

Ladies and Gentlemen, where do I start?

First of all, I'd love to say, by closing this thread down and moving to "Piecing", yep, it's that good.

I just spent the entire afternoon with my boys and XW, and it was wonderful. Thanksgiving in it'self, well, the begining. The emotions started pouring in from XW's front, and well, they ARE real. She wanted to come to dinner and I thought that not right at the time, plus my family is not ready for that.

XW called me the night before from "our" house. "missed me" and all that jazz. Long story short, we were both skiddish about the whole ordeal. I had a up and down time, emotional half the time.

I had to drop the boys off at "our house" the next day, that was brutal. got over it.

Yesterday, I was supposed to go out on a date, but was tired from moving stuff around in preperation for my cousin's kid moving back here, and emotionally drained from XW's comments the day prior. I extended the offer to go out, her and I for a sit down, she declined sighting stuff on her end.

Today, i got a string of messages from her wanting to talk. I finally did, and it went VERY well. We are both of thinking that this (D) was NOT the answer. And long story short, I miss her, she misses me, I extended the offer to dinner yet again, and SHE ACCEPTED!!!!!!!!!!

We went to dinner, for the first time as a group in 14 months. I spent quite a bit of doe, but every chance we had with the kids off playing games or something, XW and I talked. I got the chance to read her, hard, right into her eyes, and she knew it, she felt it and returned it. IT'S STILL THERE! I even got the chance to hold her hand over the table, when she got fogged and pull her out! We then took the boys for ice cream and the I dropped them off.

At that point she even extended the offer to come in. Being her father and I have some SERIOUS issues and the fact that OM lived there for so long, I declined. But we did have a beer in the back yard and made small talk.

At the end of it all, we hugged, for the first time in almost year, and it felt so good. I directly went for the back of her hair (as always) and she was fine with it (that and she had 3 inch heal on that made her tower over me ) I think that really confused the kids, but all is well, extrememly well on this front.

What do I do now? I don't want to be pushy. She went into today knowing by my own admission, I am stil emotionally attached, and she confirmed, she is too. And well, I saw it, you all know the look from your other that DOES NOT lie.


Heh, we even played this crossword video game at the bar where we ate. As a group. We scored 6th highest on the record, signed "the wrights".

I'll give it a few more inter actions before moving my story, but it all looks REALLY good from here. I texted XW (btw, she says she's never referred to me as anything other than her H ), that the boys seemed to ahve a good time and I did too. She replied she did as well