What I learned about detachment

[steady]

detachment can be done no matter what you "feel"

As long as you are looking for a feeling of detachment then you are on the wrong road. Detachment can easily be done with the actions of detachment. It can be done even if you don't feel like it...

The sooner people stop associating detachment with feelings the sooner they will understand what it means. Matter of fact, you don't even have to understand what it means.

Same as you don't have to feel love to be loving. You don't have to feel like going to work, to go to work. You don't have to feel disciplined to be disciplined.

The people who go by their feelings or wait for the feeling of detachment are slaves to their feelings. That is why it takes some longer than others. It does NOT just come when it comes. It CAN be initiated and it can be accelerated.

Just because you feel detached doesn't mean you are detached. Same as just because you don't feel you aren't detached doesn't have to mean you aren't. Stop going by your feelings. Feelings can deceive you. They can change from moment to moment.

Interesting post gucci. I never said it can't be initiated or accelerated. I worked my ass off to become detached and it was mostly a mental working and had nothing to do with an emotional working. In my opinion, if you're emotionally not attached then you are detached. I didn't have a physical or mental attachment to my W. It was an emotional attachment.

I could rationalize the [censored] out of why I shouldn't be attached, why her treatment of me would be grounds for me to just walk away, but you can't rationalize yourself out of anything. If this were true, then all I would have to do is give myself one example of why I should be detached and then I would be.

So how do people go about accelerating and initiating detachment?

What's your definition of detachment?

Thoughts can change from moment to moment. So is a person supposed to trust those?

I'm honestly asking for your input because this is what I see as one of the biggest blocks for people in the situation they find themselves here for. I know first hand from my experience if I had achieved the level of detachment I'm at now in the beginning of my sitch a lot of things would have been very different throughout the whole thing. I'm sure any help in creating detachment would be well received.

I happen to disagree with some of your points but I always look for a better perspective than my own - that's how I grow.