She Say's She Want's Out Of The Marriage

[tbart01]

I spoke to the friend and it wasn't as bad as I thought, but it's still not good.

I was told that she wanted me to deploy so she could work on getting prepared for this divorce. She told the friend that she was hoping it was for a year, because she knows the law in our state requires you to not be living under the same roof for 1 year before a divorce can be final.

She used to tell the friend that she was going to put the house up for sale and get herself a little house to rent, and that they would have to go shopping to decorate it.

She already knows how much she's going to get for child support, and that she gets half my retirement. Even though my D14 wan't to live with me she won't let her.

She was talking about getting a restraining order against me when I return because she doesn't know how I'm going to react. She wanted someone to come with her when she picks me up from the airport. She's kept all the emails I've sent her since I've been here to use with her lawyer if i give her any problems when I get home.

Basically what I got from the friend is that my W has been planning this since before Ii deployed, which I've known. However, allot of this has changed because she never followed through with some of her plans.

Allot of this does have to do with money like I had mentioned in earlier posts. She blames me for us not being where she thinks we should be financially. She mentioned that if shes going to be broke and married she might as well be single and married.

It really does hurt me to know that the entire time I've been deployed, she's been planning our divorce. I know however that her behavior and the things she's said to other people have shown that she's confused about everything.

It's almost like she puts on this tough exterior, but inside she's confused. I know the reality is she thinks she wants a D most of the time, but sometimes she's not sure.

This all just reinforces the fact that I need to go home and move on. I need to plan on life without her, and whatever happens will happen.

This new information isn't a total shock, but i was surprised to hear how deep her plan has been. She was planning this the entire time I was gone.

I really don't know what to do with this new information. Should i confront her on some of these things or just let it go? It's going to eat me up inside I know that. these were thoughts she had 3 months ago, and the friend doesn't know what she's doing now. They really don't speak that much anymore.