Hey Cautious. I am sorry for you, me and everyone else here that our WAS's care more about the temporal pleasures they are seeking than committment, loyalty, integrity ect.ect. Even though I want my husband to desire a life with my son and I again, there is that thought that he simply lacks character, and will never change. And you know what, I don't want my son to grow up to be like that. Maybe we are lucky they left even if it hurts like h...! The truth is my son worships him. Maybe someday my husband will be able to be a role model for him. Maybe when his testosterone level decreases, his son will be more important than OW. Don't let yourself get on a guilt trip about the choices you have needed to make. Honestly, having to experience the pain my son is having is enough to make me wish he had not been born so he could avoid this. We tried so hard to have him, and were so happy when he was conceived and it just blows my mind that STBX could walk away. Like you, I am stuck seeing STBX often due to child care. The good thing about that is, I have done a 180 in my behavior and attitude, and he has noticed. I came home from work and he had gone to the grocery store for me and bought some of my favorite things, folded my laundry, and changed the lightbulbs. And he has been sticking around a little longer after I get home. I need him out of here though, because he is able to satisfy what little desire he has for family and home, have his cake and eat it too. I am pathetic! I look for anything to convince myself he is missing us. So what if he buys groceries ect ect. He filed for divorce and surprised me with it, and had me served on our son's first day of kindergarten. Why I still want him is the million dollar question. Thanks to everyone for being here and sharing yourself. This forum has been my life line for over a year.
