Great now I'm going to worry about worrying too much:)
ENJOY the ride.... I get it, I get it!
It's tough not over analyze. But that is what I've been doing for so long I have make that a 180. Go with the flow. I used to be like that. With all the pressures of life I guess I let them get to me.
I think I need to get high with a little help from friends more often!
Thanks gucci, I needed that.
Steve, that quote was in reference to how I should proceed legally, your kind of protection is already in my pocket.
I'm not worried about the papers at the moment. I was at first, but she can have them served to me if she wants to. I'm not picking them up at her lawyers office like she mentioned. She hasn't brought up any D/R talk all week so I'm not going to worry.
Nooner had to be a quickie. FIL called from the ER while we were in the middle of it. She had to pick him up for some heart related reason.
Rhianna's not my taste, how about dirty deeds done dirt cheap.
Because of her work/school schedule, she will not be able to see S8 this week. So this Saturday (should be her night to have him, long story) she asked if she could come over and stay the night. She mentioned I could still do what ever I was going to.
I'm not worried about this, living in the moment. It would be great to have her back for a night. But I don't want this to be cake eating.
I don't have any plans, should I go out anyway (GAL), or should I make it a "family" night. We already laid the groundwork (no pun intended) for a little Saturday fun before she wanted to stay the night.
BTW steve, you and I come from the same school of thought. I asked her the very same question "does the carpet match the drapes?". No carpet left;)
So this Saturday (should be her night to have him, long story) she asked if she could come over and stay the night. She mentioned I could still do what ever I was going to.
Oh, you should DEFINITELY make sure you have some plans and keep them.
Quote:
I don't have any plans, should I go out anyway (GAL), or should I make it a "family" night. We already laid the groundwork (no pun intended) for a little Saturday fun before she wanted to stay the night.
I would recommend going out while she is at your place. Remember earlier that I told YOU that YOU should have some friends of the female persuasion? You better hurry up and get one or more. Just find one you can be buddy's with.
The whole key here Jake is to look like YOU are cake eating too. You want your wife wondering why you are so cool calm and collected and not chasing her. Remember.. Good for the goose is good for the gander. Be nice. Be mysterious. Go out and have some fun, fun, fun and then get home late and continue to act as you have been. NO relationship talks. Everything is water off a ducks back to you. You want her to think that you are perfectly happy just the way things are in your life. You want her to wonder if it is YOU that is cake eating. Good for the goose is good for the gander....
Tell her you will be home early and then get home late. If she says something about that, just say, "oh sorry, I guess I didn't realize what time it was... Then drop it....
Enjoy the moment. Enjoy that you are being nice to each other. Enjoy that she is chasing you now. Enjoy that she WANTS to come over Saturday.... Enjoy your night out..
Gucci you read my mind. Thanks for the words of encouragement. You've been a great help. I'm finally starting to take my life back.
It's a good feeling when you can control you emotions no matter what life throws at you.
W called from work this morning right as my alarm was going off. She was crying, her job is moving her to the night shift in a month (she knew this might happen).
S8 will have to stay with me full time and it will affect night school. The life she thought she was going to have and the happiness she was going to feel are slipping away. I feel somewhat bad for her. I validated her feelings and said we could talk later if she wanted.
I'm not going to let her come back to me crying expecting me fix everything. She chose to leave, if she would have stayed none of this would be a problem. I will listen to her, but I will not bail her out.
She had to ask me how to balance her checking account yesterday. She's 29 years old and can't balance a checking account, come on. I was nice and answered her questions, but the whole time I kept getting a vision of S8 (bit of a math wiz) sitting at the table doing her accounting for her some night.
Maybe I could ask her to sleep on the couch because I might be bringing someone back with me;) No, I wouldn't do that. I would love to see the look on her face though. I could tell her she can join in if she likes. LOL
Maybe I could ask her to sleep on the couch because I might be bringing someone back with me;) No, I wouldn't do that. I would love to see the look on her face though. I could tell her she can join in if she likes. LOL
You DO get it now...... THAT is the attitude you need to keep. Happy men do NOT lose their wives. Only unhappy men who act depressed and complain and whine and act irritable do...
Women rarely leave a HAPPY man. Be that man. No pressure. Mystery. ALWAYS be nice. Always.
Get a friend of the oppostie sex to hang with. (extremely important) If your wife can have "friends" then you most certainly can have your friends too...
Good for the goose is good for the gander.
KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK.. Water off a ducks back. Mature, cool, calm, collected.
W called Saturday before she came over. She was unsure about staying over night. She didn't want lay there wondering when I would be home, if I was hooking up w/ a OP, or bring someone home with me. (sound familiar, see my last post)
The three of us watched a movie before I had to get ready for my night out. W and S8 had plans to go bowling while I was gone.
When I was in the shower W came in upset, asking me why her name was changed to opportunity on my phone. First I asked why was she snooping. I don't care because I have nothing to hide, but she would hang me if I did that. In fact my snooping in the past is one of the reasons she wants to get D.
I let it roll off my back. She thought it was because every time she called it was an opportunity for her to use me or take advantage of me. I told her it was because every time she called it was an opportunity for me to be nice, listen, ect. ect.
Unfortunately the people I was going to hang out with all night called it quits early. When I got home W was sleeping on the couch. As I walked by her to go to bed, she stopped me. Asked how my night was, I did the same. Then she jumped by bones. We slept together in the bed. It was so nice having her there. Nice to have her sleep next to me.
W will not stop sexting me, wanting sex, calling me... She asked if I was "ok" with this(sex)on Friday. I said I was. She drops little hints to remind me she still wants a D. Sucks.
W just called, she told me I have one more week to pick up the D papers or they will serve me at work. I said do what you have to. I'm not going to pick to them up.
She emailed asking if I was upset. I'm not going to reply, but come on. You just brought up D papers. I'm not going to do back flips. She is expecting me loose it. I'm going to. Then she sent a few more, what are you guys doing tonight?, I'll quit bothering you, have a good day.....
I would like to say something. I would like to tell her to stop this crap. Quit playing games. As it stands now I'm more her husband than I was a month ago. Until this morning, and the D papers of course.
I would like sit down with her and talk about her feelings. I know they are mixed. But I can't do that can I.
maybe she was just in the mood for some...and wanted you for a stunt "c*&k"...tread carefully in those waters, been there..but deep down she stills wants to "find herself."
