In some cases I've seen, exposure at work was a case of revenge. Kind of like the need to punish the other person.
Personally, I think exposure should be done only to the immediate family involved like the OP's spouse. When it's done at work, you can jeopardize your spouse's career. And that goes far beyond the relationship.
I would not be quick to reccomend exposure of an affair to your WS' workplace... WOrkplace exposure is most often left to the third party's workplace when used as leverage...
If you show enough guts to walk into OM's place of work and create a huge scene and embarass him along with yourself... he may think twice about chasing your wife further... particularly if he wants to save his rep at work... and knows you can keep coming back to embarass him further...
I have seen this happen in my own workplace, it was very effective.
A female divorced PM in my workplace was having an affair with a married man. The man's wife showed up at our workplace openly threatening the PM.
That same PM was let go less than three months later, and she had been working there for over twenty years.
Exposure did a LOT of damage to that affair. If I recall the PM is still looking for work, and this was almost a year ago. The man she was sleeping with reconcilled with his wife, he had two children.
I can get all this because the man she was sleeping with used to work there too.
If the wife hadn't shown up at work, I doubt the affair would be over even now a year later.
