Welcome to our special little world....I don't say "sorry your here" anymore. I feel that in the end you will find that this is a growing place of good than a place of sorrow. That said...it appears you have a prolonged MLC husband and the OW is firmly planted in the picture. I would almost venture a bet that she has recently placed the "Her or me" statement on your husband. With the usually MLC bravado of course he is selecting to move on.
So let him!
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He indicated that 'once things are settled' he plans on moving in with OW who lives on the other end of the state
Validate his feelings and nicely tell him that he can go at anytime. Sounds pretty counter intuitive...same here. Just sometimes that alluring greener grass is just covering a septic tank. So as I wise person told me..."Give them their space and let them choke on it".
You seem to have a solid grasp that you don't control his actions. You also have an impressive list of 180's and GAL...bravo to you on both. The questions is...will dropping the rope entirely be the ultimate 180 for you?
I think there is a lot of good in your story that is being directly influenced by a relationship with the OW that needs to run it's course. So let it run it's course.
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I feel like there is only so much I can do to delay the inevitable.
There is no "inevitable" or "impossible" in this world. That is what makes our lives special....we can do the impossible and make the inevitable unobtainable.
Don't think this course of action is giving up, because it isn't. YOU can stand by your commitments with home or not.....this is just giving him what he wants.
