FM, thanks and I think that's where I wasn't sure of myself. On the one hand I don't want her to feel she's stuck with one and can't see the other. It's hard for a little kid to choose, they love you both and they'd much rather bounce back and forth like she used to when we all lived under the same roof. She'd have my attention for a while then she'd run to mom etc.

Now, I hate forcing her to be with me or her mom. Having said that you're also right that she needs discipline, consistency and order in her life. Things can't be in a limbo. Last time when my wife left I was the one to come up with our rolling 2 days with her and 2 days with me and it worked out well. This time I haven't said anything yet. One thing she complains about is me wanting everything planned out. She didn't like that. However, this is for my DD and I don't care what she thinks and that's the discussion I'll have with her soon.

Thanks for setting me straight there.

Me: 35|WAW: 38|D: 6yo | http://tinyurl.com/2dxx7m6
Feb 2006, left, came back in two weeks
Aug 2006, left again
Apr 2007, filed for divorce
Dec 2007, reunited
Mar 2010, moved out, filed again