H had another phone call today that's three in about a week, maybe it's the sense of nearly being there that's rocking my boat, also as CW said I miss you all and catching up with you! H is away on and off for the next few days so I'm going to catch up some of the action on DB!
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W 47 H 47 M 24 T 30
Once lost but now found and happily married again!
I'm just not coping at the moment, our financial situation is just swamping us, home no longer feels like a sanctuary as people ring up and occasionally come to the door, my life is a mess and I just don't know what to do! It's been four and half months H has been looking for work and I honestly no longer have the will to believe it's going to sort itself out soon. I'm working a long week and doing overtime I can't do more! Now on top of it all H has gone away for two days back for an eve then away again for two days, I'm miffed he's doing his hobbies while I'm stuck here and on top of that I now can't contact him but neither can propspective job people. Honestly I really have had enough!
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W 47 H 47 M 24 T 30
Once lost but now found and happily married again!
He has had some calls and interviews and leads, if I remember correctly. I'd be frustrated too if I felt he was on holiday and unavailable for interview phone calls. Not sure what to say except watch out, seems like things could blow up. If you're going to have to discuss this with him, I'd wait 48 hours. Today sounds awful. ODP.
Are you getting rest and sleep and recreation deprived with this overtime? Can you go spend the night at a friend or family member's house for a few nights to get the situation out of your face? You are certainly doing your best and should be proud of yourself.
On the job front I do think some more effort wouldn't go amiss, certainly ATM being away and not able to check the job net pages for two days this time he can't afford!
Yes my GAL time is going to be impacted seriously in the next twelve weeks, will be working in the region of a fifty hour week, which limits my time spent with madam and also because I owe money to yard madam lives on my other sanctuary isn't comfortable at all because I know I owe so much money.
I'm just going to be tired, missing my darling madam and trying to hang onto an impossible ODP I feel a hypocrite encouraging you ladies to ODP when mine is hanging on by a thread. Wish I could some how dig myself out I just don't know where to start.. Not helped by not being able to contact H cos his phone has broken.. I do feel my own sense of security is to be built financially on my own, trouble is I have my own I'm just having to share it and when H has the capicuty to earn five times as much as me I feel so hopeless. I totally get I can't fix it but it does need fixing yesterday if you get my gist and the only way it gets fixed is by him getting a job! Sorry I need to rant can't let it out elsewhere ATM
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W 47 H 47 M 24 T 30
Once lost but now found and happily married again!
(((Rabbit))) I'm afraid all I can do is join you. Our financial sitch is catching up to us and I am completely overwhelmed today. It is so hard to cope with that while trying to recover from a M crisis. I feel for you. Lots of (((hugs))) for you today!
I think fatigue is making your ODP harder. I think your challenge over the next few days will be to figure out how to make the next 12 weeks without an explosion, without as much access to Madam, KNOWING you will be overtired. A fifty hour a week is hard on a 21-year-old! I think H IS going to eventually come through on a job. It IS frustrating bearing the financial brunt of a situation you did not create. I like your attitude about building your sense of security about financial stability on your own for your future. Try to frame this situation as very temporary and something you're doing for YOU so that you can always take care of yourself in the future, even as an old widow. LOL.
I think you are going to find the strength from somewhere these next few weeks if you can find enough sleep and alone time. You might need to "go for a walk" when H gets back if you are already angry before he even gets there. Instead of ODP, it's Operation Avoid until something simmers down.
I think H will pick up his slack on his own without confronting him about it at this time. I think if you do, it might be a setback because he is probably already self conscious about being supported by you at this time. Just a thought.
