Thanks MarriedWolf, for the thoughtful response. Yes, he has said that about the actions before. And he perceives himself as a nice guy, though I don't really see him the same way. He feels like a "chump" for hanging in here as long as he has. But while he has complained sporadically about sex over the years, 99% of the time has acted happy, carefree, satisfied, etc. on a daily basis until he finally blew up a few months ago out of the blue. He stuffs his feelings down til they boil over. So yes, I've told him I'd work on it, with mixed success- you don't always get it right the first time- but in the middle of me trying, he said he was done (this was a few months I got, one whole month of which I was initiating and having more sex than we'd had in the past year), so I feel like I was destined to fail before starting. He let me try for a few months and then declared himself "done". I know he doesn't believe I can change, but how can I show him anything if he won't let me? Very frustrating.
His game is something I have no experience in and no interest- actually, I believe (and he has said) that he uses it to escape life and ME. So playing with him doesn't seem like a wise thing.
I'm hoping some others will respond here-- than you for writing back.
Jaime
When the men on the chessboard Get up and tell you where to go; And you've just had some kind of mushroom And your mind is moving slow; Go ask Alice... I think she'll know.
