I believe Harley actually said twelve weeks for withdrawal Pup did he not? I am at work so I don't have time to check.
Still looking for that -- I thought it was shorter, but I could be wrong. My wife's was about 2-3 weeks, and her moods were ALL OVER THE MAP. It was horrible.
I did find this interview with Dr. Harley, which I found very interesting (emphasis mine):
Quote:
Dr. HARLEY: Well, the first thing they have to do is get away from the attractive person, and that's the first step.
MEEUWSEN: Are most people willing to do that?
Dr. HARLEY: No, but that's the first step. I have to talk people into doing things that just are totally irrational to them. They don't understand that leaving this person that they're attracted to is the first step toward marital recovery. If they're having an affair, they can never see or talk to the lover again the rest of their lives. And that's the first step in recovery, is never seeing or talking to another lover. It may mean you have to quit your job. Many of the people I've counseled, many pastors I've counseled, have had to leave the state to get away from lovers that they have. And you have to totally separate. Again, think of it as an addiction. How do you get over being addicted to alcohol? You get away from the substance that you're addicted to. And the same thing is true in marriage.
The second thing is you have to go through withdrawal because once you leave the addictive situation, you will go through a period of deep depression, and one of the things that people have told me--the betrayed spouse says, one of the hardest parts of all of this is to get through the withdrawal, because here they have their husband or wife back but the husband or wife is miserable. And they blame it all on them, see? And then once you're through withdrawal, it ends. If they don't see or talk to the spouse, it ends. They're through withdrawal; then the recovery can actually begin. But there's a sense in which people try to recover with the lover still there. That never works, just like you can't get over being an alcoholic if you're drinking all the time.
