She Say's She Want's Out Of The Marriage

[Surviving03]

i feel your pain tbart.... my H comes home tomorrow and I am scared to death about all those same things. This homecoming was supposed to be VERY different than what it is going to be. I cant imagine sharing this house with a person who doesnt love me and doesnt want to be with me. I am not sure if he will try to be intimate with me, but I am scared for him to do that if all he is going to do is still leave me afterwards. Or have him completely reject me and want to be nowhere near me... it scares me to death. The only thing that even kind of helps me is to try to mentally detach from him... try to act as if this D is really definitly going to happen (which it prob is) and try to tell myself that I dont want to be with this person he has turned into... even if I do end up being with him, its all i can do to stay sane right now is to talk myself into feeling that I dont want this, i dont deserve this, and i do not like this person he is now. WHich is true, I dont. Of course I still love him... of course i still pray for a miracle... maybe you can take comfort in knowing that God will take care of this for you, if it is going to be it will be, even if its a long bumpy road to get there, and if its not meant to be, and there is someone else that needs you more than your W does... well you can take comfort in the fact that a day will come when you ARE happy again. I know its easier said than done, but just give it a try.