I had the same confusion about that. Detachment does not = giving up on the R. You just have to detch your emotion and expectations from it because you can't control him. It is setting boundaries like he's not going to come over and upset you when its raining and not help with the basement, he won't have the opportunity to tell you that you forgot to pick up puppysh*t.
It gives him free rein without you driving everything Essentially you are giving him the rope to hang himself with. If he were wanting to rencile the marriage what would he be doing? What would indicate he is commiting?
My goal is to some day be the person my dog thinks I am
