Divorced, Dating, and Parenting

[~Sol]

Oh, I was just thinking about private schools on my own. Yeah, the bus for the gifted school is a logistics nightmare - I would have to drop and pick up my D - X will not drive that route when she is half-asleep from her night-shift job.

My X is weird about keeping our D in her own school district. If it were up to me, I would want to try out a private school but I would be the one ponying up the dough. But the fact of the matter is that my D actually has good teachers, and she is learning a lot. On occasion she would get homework that is a challenge for her, but its the extra credit kind that forces her think and use those critical thinking skills that she needs to hone. I think she will be challenged enough in a normal middle school, and I am sure that her teachers will probably put her in a gifted program at her middle school. If a gifted school comes up again, I am going to get the backing of her school teachers when my X tries to oppose it - she just doesn't want to let go of the "control factor" over D's school district.

We both have joint legal custody, but we also have a unique joint physical custody, only in the divorce decree it states that D attends mom's school district since mom is able to care for D after school until mom goes to work at 9pm, but I get my D right after I leave work so D can have a parent that is actually awake and help with homework, dinner, and bedtime. I drop off my D by 8am and we do this daily. We alternate on weekends, holidays, etc, etc. Now, add a school that is beyond the current school district, and X throws a fit, and we would need to amend the divorce agreement. If I want it, I would need to pay $$$ for a dam good atty that would make it happen - else why go to court if I wasn't going to win this new arrangement? And if I did win, X would be on the rampage and we start a war all over again. My X will not change, she can be extremely vile when she is stubborn. The best thing is for X to agree voluntarily that our D should go to a different school, whether gifted or private, and I would need to quit my job for a better paying one and move closer to the new school but it just opens up a new can of worms, and we just settled on the agreed arrangement we now have and everyone gets along for the most part.

When my D starts middle school - I am going to be involved with her school, join the PTA, and be more proactive from the 6th grade all the way to her senior year in high school. If I want to make a change to the agreement, I need to build a strong case, but the judge is the final decision, and in family civil courts in VA the judge is more likely a female judge. We had a female judge when we got divorced, and I was made to look like the bad guy since I was the one that filed for divorce - LOL.