I stumbled on this boundaries thread and was wondering if someone could help with this issue as I think it might be a boundary thing, but not sure.
W and I have been in MC for about 3 months now, we're still separated and she's not yet committed to working on our marriage, though we have resolved many issues in MC.
During exchanges of our son I've been inviting her into my apartment now for nearly 3 and a half months. She even had lunch here once. During that whole time she has not once let me in her house during a pickup/dropoff. I feel disrepected by that act, somehow. That she lets friends and family enter her house, but not me.
Is this a boundary issue and can you think of a nice way for me to state it? I don't see any enforcement possibility if she just doesn't care. I don't want to do something retaliatory like not letting her my place anymore...that seems childish.
It is not a boundary. It is her choice about letting you in her home. Respect that. It is your choice to let her in your home. If she was entering your home without being invited, and it bother you, you should set a boundary. Boundaries define how you will respond when she enters YOUR space and are enforceable. My X was showing up to my place unannounced with the kids to "Get things". I set the boundary that this was not acceptable to me and she needs to call first. See the difference?
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
