I think it is the sex that is keeping you on the string. My w has not even hinted at having sex since last april so it has been a bit easier to detach. I cannot even imagine what I would be like if we still ML once in a while. I have not ML to anyone for over a year for that matter. I think you are still too afraid of making your wife angry or sad by distancing but that is what needs to happen.
Me 35 Wife 34 Two daughters 8 years and 3 years Bomb 3/30/09 W filed 4/16/09 We met in'92 married in 2000 Divorce final