I hear you and understand. Unfortunately, you can't make her do anything. That includes making her see logic. She's stuck in a world of helplessness. Until SHE decides to make a change in HER situation, I doubt much will change for the better.
Your choice on what to do (and there is nor wrong answer). But, if she isn't going to change, (a) do you really want her, this HER she's become and (b) how long will you hold out hope she will change? You can walk two paths - one moving on with your life and the other remaining open (but not hopeful) to reconciliation.
This is a tough step, b/c you want your M to work out SO badly. If she just saw this or understood that, we could work this out...Until she wants to do the work, it will not work out.
Might be time for some brutal reality - her loosing you. At this point, what has she truly lost?
