WAW and me in 11th hour!!!!

[Ken62]

Hi Sandi,

W stopped by last night after dinner with FIL and GF and D20 and after D20 headed back to college and FIL and GF started to pack we ended up having a 3 hour talk. It started out with her being upset about D20 who is very similar to her in personality. D20 was telling her things that she didn't want to hear and they just were on a different wave length. W also mentioned that she has started to remember the good times which made me think that she is coming out of the fog a little. I didn't get my hopes up and I played it cool. But I did see some positive signs over the 3 hours. I still feel that she sees the D happening and the annulment but I also believe that three months can be a long time and that some things can change and even if it does happen I think that we are on a path going forward that is at least in the right direction. I was able to tell her some of the things that she has done that have hurt me and she was able to tell me some things that I have done that have hurt her. At one point early on she said that what I was saying seemed "too aggressive" so I backed off because I didn't want to scare her away or make her feel pursued. She mentioned that lately I was coming across as aloof and she wondered what that was about. She took credit for some of it because she was asking me about things that she was taking from the house but she also asked if there was someone new in my life and I told her that yes there was. She said that she was happy for me and I want to believe her but I don't know if I really can. I told her that I wasn't sure what would happen going forward but that I was happier than I have been in a long time and people are starting to see that and commenting on it. She seemed to think that we would be seeing each other more often and she even mentioned that she had been wanting to ask me to do things recently but didn't because of my aloofness. She reminded me that these wouldn't be dates and I told her that it was important for her to tell me that so that I don't do or say the wrong thing. Overall our communication was very good (something that I told her we really needed to work on and that we weren't very good at in the past) and I also was able to tell her that she really needed to be able to express herself to me instead of assuming that I knew where she was coming from. She still thinks that we are on different wave lengths but not as far apart as we used to be so I feel that she is softening somewhat to me but I know that this is a marathon and not a sprint. I didn't bring up IC or MC or her moving back home or anything like that. I steered clear of the land mines as best I could and I would say that it was a pretty great three hour talk but I am still going to GAL and go out on Friday with my new lady friend and try and stay detached. All contact with W will still need to be initiated by her and we will see where it goes.

Thanks,

Ken