!Help! Need Advice and encouragement!

[stark648]

I've always felt she likes the male attention for all SORTS of reasons...

Which still begs the question:

Would I be better off without her?

I still love her, of course, that just doesn't shut off like a valve, but I do seem to be feeling much more negative towards her.

I'm trying not to be resentful or angry--that really would do ME more damage.

But, I'm also trying to look at her with my logical side vs. my heart.

Then, there's always the "do the right thing for the kids/family" thing also.

I'm just going to keep praying and doing the best I can to leave it in God's hands...He knows best, but sometimes I worry because I know He usually doesn't interfere with our "free will" to screw up our own selves.

He would forgive my wife, I know, but the consequences (like a pregnancy?-lack of trust, etc.) would still have to be dealt with. She would also have to actually be remorseful, and I don't see her there yet(if ever).

I also see that I keep feeling a bit less for her as time goes on...and I see more of her historically bad behavior.

In the meantime, I'm getting more addicted to the internet social websites scene and I gotta curb that!! I am experiencing 'where she was' before things got quite so crazy with her.

She was doing a lot of the Facebook, etc. right before things went sour. Shoot, I'm even kinda addicted to this DB website as well!

Any advice or opinions? It saddens me more as I feel the negative feelings towards my W --like she never really was that good of a mate in the first place.

We were very close emotionally off and on during our relationship(much more on, than off). The closeness is priceless in a relationship, but the roller-coaster drama that would recurr from time to time---I mean, I know all marriages have ups and downs, but---how much is too much?


I dunno--any thoughts?