So sorry to hear, NC. That must be so painful. ((((((NC)))))))
I don't know what to say. I don't believe their M will last; I know they often don't. I think at some point, your X will let some of her anger go and look in the mirror.
You were already planning on going nc, and I think you should def. do that. I'm going to bed now & I'll pray for you and your boys also. Things will work out!!!