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Re: How do you forget....how do you turn off the love? Drew #1958836 03/15/10 04:20 PM
Joined: Nov 2007 Posts: 1,053 D ddstartingover OP Member
OP ddstartingover Member D Joined: Nov 2007 Posts: 1,053	Originally Posted By: Drew Why do you live in such fear of this man? I don't know..............I wish I did. The anger that has manifested in this stage of his life is so uncharacteristic of who he was. I have lived the last two+ years trying to avoid it and had the crazy notion that if I could go X amount of time with out making him angry he would come back to me...........I know it's wrong, I just don't know how to stop being afraid of it/him. Me 45 M 25 yrs; T 31 yrs;bomb 8/15/06; moves out 7/18/08 D 18, D 14, S 12

Re: How do you forget....how do you turn off the love? ddstartingover #1958838 03/15/10 04:23 PM
Joined: Mar 2007 Posts: 2,320 Likes: 10 D Drew Member
Drew Member D Joined: Mar 2007 Posts: 2,320 Likes: 10	Only you can stop giving him that power over you. Everybody hurts. It's part of life. Don't miss the good stuff.

Re: How do you forget....how do you turn off the love? Drew #1958874 03/15/10 05:08 PM
Joined: Nov 2007 Posts: 1,053 D ddstartingover OP Member
OP ddstartingover Member D Joined: Nov 2007 Posts: 1,053	More work to do on me............. Me 45 M 25 yrs; T 31 yrs;bomb 8/15/06; moves out 7/18/08 D 18, D 14, S 12

Re: How do you forget....how do you turn off the love? ddstartingover #1958890 03/15/10 05:31 PM
Joined: Mar 2008 Posts: 10,326 Kansas K kat727 Member
kat727 Member K Joined: Mar 2008 Posts: 10,326 Kansas	Maybe this whole soft ball thing is his dream and not hers. I think you should support her and love her and quit letting him put so much pressure on her to be this superstar. This is one way that kids that have that initial passion end up quitting because the parent(s) wanted it more than the kid did. This guy left, he can't keep controlling your life. kat Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory

Re: How do you forget....how do you turn off the love? kat727 #1958923 03/15/10 06:18 PM
Joined: Nov 2007 Posts: 1,053 D ddstartingover OP Member
OP ddstartingover Member D Joined: Nov 2007 Posts: 1,053	I do think it is his dream. She loves to play----but does want more in her life----including time to do NOTHING---and at 13, I think she deserves the chance to do all that she can do. I just DO NOT understand why he doesn't think the same way I do....maybe we are more different than I thought....maybe this isn't just a MLC issue. Who can know? I've given in to all that he wants in respect to ball schedules, thinking it was the right thing to do to bring him back. Now I'm in the position where it's going to look like I'm balking because of the D, but it really isn't. I want my kids to grow up and be happy and not feel like they didn't get the opportunities do do what they wanted----or resent their parents for not letting them to. Me 45 M 25 yrs; T 31 yrs;bomb 8/15/06; moves out 7/18/08 D 18, D 14, S 12

Re: How do you forget....how do you turn off the love? ddstartingover #1958966 03/15/10 07:19 PM
Joined: Mar 2007 Posts: 2,320 Likes: 10 D Drew Member
Drew Member D Joined: Mar 2007 Posts: 2,320 Likes: 10	Originally Posted By: ThisCan'tBTheEnd Now I'm in the position where it's going to look like I'm balking because of the D, but it really isn't. Look like to whom? Everybody hurts. It's part of life. Don't miss the good stuff.

Re: How do you forget....how do you turn off the love? Drew #1958974 03/15/10 07:25 PM
Joined: Nov 2007 Posts: 1,053 D ddstartingover OP Member
OP ddstartingover Member D Joined: Nov 2007 Posts: 1,053	Look to him.....but I know, I shouldn't care..... Me 45 M 25 yrs; T 31 yrs;bomb 8/15/06; moves out 7/18/08 D 18, D 14, S 12

Re: How do you forget....how do you turn off the love? ddstartingover #1958992 03/15/10 07:37 PM
Joined: Mar 2007 Posts: 2,320 Likes: 10 D Drew Member
Drew Member D Joined: Mar 2007 Posts: 2,320 Likes: 10	Exactly. Everybody hurts. It's part of life. Don't miss the good stuff.

Re: How do you forget....how do you turn off the love? Drew #1959085 03/15/10 09:34 PM
Joined: Nov 2007 Posts: 1,053 D ddstartingover OP Member
OP ddstartingover Member D Joined: Nov 2007 Posts: 1,053	God!!! Why can I not stop caring!!!! Me 45 M 25 yrs; T 31 yrs;bomb 8/15/06; moves out 7/18/08 D 18, D 14, S 12

Re: How do you forget....how do you turn off the love? ddstartingover #1959089 03/15/10 09:42 PM
Joined: Mar 2008 Posts: 10,326 Kansas K kat727 Member
kat727 Member K Joined: Mar 2008 Posts: 10,326 Kansas	Because you have put so much weight on what he thought for all these years. He does not have your best interests at heart anymore. I am sorry, that is even a bit painful to write but oh so true. Time for you to focus on you.(And your kids of course). kat Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory

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