I confronted from day 1 and it was not good. I was begging and pleading too much for her to return to the marriage. That was done before I found this site. And before anyone responded to my initial post, I had informed her family in Thailand that they had a wayward daughter/sister and I had let too many other people know that she was a cheater. Up to the point where I gave her the boot out of the house, I was a terrible DBer.
That paying down the debt sure does seem like buying bullets for your own execution.
At some point, letting the cat out of the bag that you know she is fooling around with a married man would remove some of the excitement she is getting by the secrecy of the A. There is no easy way to do it though.
