Next steps

[flowmom]

Aver, it's awesome that you are coming to terms with all of the aspects of this. And I'm glad that you have a choice about the house.

I am at a middle stage in my healing, and now am faced with the Big Girl question: the house is mine if I want the financial/time burden of it.

This decision should be 100% based on what is right for you in the next chapter of your life.

I chose a low-maintenance home because I saw myself spending my time in nature, having adventures, and spending time with my kids...not doing yard work.

But maybe you could look at the house and seriously think about how much cash you could extract out of it each month. If you love the house perhaps you could rent out the workshop and use the cash to pay someone to do the yardwork, or get some kind of barter set up that trades off getting others to do the maintenance work in exchange for use of the house/property. I know you already have a roommate, but think outside of the box of ways that you could have your cake and eat it too.

Maintaining a detached house and yard IS a lot of life energy though. And is it a better future investment to keep this home or build a new one?

Of course I'm going to ask you to let go of the guilt. Do you even know for sure if he wants to live in your house?