Reconstructing Bart

[C-Bart]

Thanks Are You Kidding. I made it through with all of your help. Maybe its a good idea to leave the phone with a friend to remove all temptations.

On another note. W and I had some pretty intense conversations last night about having the OM around the kids. She seems to think that it is ok and will have no affect on them. I on the other hand am completely opposed to any contact with OM or OW until the relationship is serious. W or at least the 16 year love struck girl that she has become is convinced that OM she met in a bar three weeks ago, who is going through a D as well, is the one. I hope she's right and this guy brings her all the happiness in the world but statistically that's probably not the case.

Have you ever tried to talk logically with a 16 year old kid? If you have you can imagine how the conversation went. I really don't care who she is seeing but they need to stay away from my kids. They do not need to deal with people coming into and out of their lives. She doesn't seem to get it. She thinks they have no idea what is going on. That is the farthest thing from the truth. We have a D12 who is watching every move we make. This is serious business here.

If it was't so serious it would be funny. She keeps wanting to drag me into a hole. She says the only reason I'm making a deal about this is because she left me and is not coming back. That OM is a really nice guy, blah, blah, blah. Now she is trying to make the fact that we are not D my fault. Saying I filed for a continuance in November when it was actually her L. Regardless of the diversion its just that a way to take the focus of what she is doing. She knows that its wrong.

Weird point in the conversation. She actually shifted out of her whatever I do is justified mode and ask this question; "What is marriage anyway?" Are you serious? What in the heck is that all about?

There were a couple of points in the conversation that I was very proud of myself. At points she was just being mean and nasty, trying to hurt me. My response was to clearly define a boundary that I was not willing to continue a conversation if she was going to treat me in that manner. Of course she denied doing it but she backed off none the less.

I'd like to say I was calm and in control of my emotions during the entire conversation but these are my kids and I will do anything to keep them from being hurt any further. If that means as she suggested that I have full custody I will do that. My hope is she heard some of what I said and took it to heart.