Hello. I would like a chance to respond to some of the posts and then to move on from this topic and then answer some of Talia's questions.
I apologize for getting so defensive. In my eyes, I was asking a question and some of responses had nothing to do with what I was asking. In my post I was using those scenarios as examples of how I was having trouble dealing with the 180 - to ask husband for help or not say anything and it felt like the scenario was taken out of context. As an earlier post described, I have been doing my 180s but this was an area where I was confused - for some reason it turned into me having a housekeeper, etc.
Robx - No offense, but some of your posts come across as rude and condesending. I already know that my husband does not think I'm fun, that he think that I don't have any value and that I don't have any self esteem. These were not revelations to me. To answer some of your questions to clarify - we have a housekeeper that comes once every two weeks. I don't normally ask my husband to vacuum or clean the house. I had scheduled the carpet cleaning about a month and a half ago; two days before they were supposed to come, while I was working and my husband was home with the dog, the dog desteoyed a feather pillow and there were feathers EVERYWHERE. I would not have if we were not having the carpets cleaned. I unexpectedly had to go into work the day before the carpet cleaning and I NICELY said, "hey, while I'm at work it would be a huge help if you could vacuum in the bedroom and pickup the dog poop. I wont be home until really late." I would have just done all this myself as had been suggested had I not been called into work. When I did get home from work and saw this hadn't been done I did just go ahead and did it myself and didn't say anything to my husband. I didn't go into all this detail in the post because it was irrelevant (at least I thought) to my question. I have just been having difficulty determining if I should still ask for help and I got my answer.
Greek - I understand that some of the things I said weren't exacly written about me but when someone says "you should be concentrating on your weight loss, GAL, etc" that would imply that I'm not already doing those things. I was defensive because instead of asking me what I'm doing it sounded like it was assumed that I hadn't started to do anything about it.
Flowmom - As far as the weight issue. It is difficult in general but also difficult because unlike your husband my husband is just as overweight as I am. He doesn't work out any more frequently than me (probably less frequently) and doesn't eat any better than me. It would be more understandable (to me at least) if he had a healthy lifestyle but he doesn't.
