How is an online affair different?

[Kelly23]

I have been feeling very angry today and said so to my husband about an hour before he was leaving for work. I said that we could stay together until the kids are grown but it is getting tougher every day. It turned into an emotional discussion about what I did to get us here, about how I cared more about my job than about him, how I never wanted to go anywhere with him and how I should have forgiven him by now.
I am so tired of the emotional roller coaster. I just want to be happy again.
I do not consider myself high maintenance. All I wanted was a home and children. To one day spend time with my grandchildren and travel to the beach each year. I worked hard getting my master's degree and a better job so we would be able to be content once the kids were gone. He says that I should have been working on us, not my degree. But when I told him about 7 years ago that I wanted to go to counseling, he told me that this is what happens when you have been married for a long time. You can't have the honeymoon feeling forever.
After the first OW, I really did think we could overcome it. I knew it would take time but I thought we were making good progress. The second OW crushed all of that and he cannot understand why I am more upset over an online affair than I am over the physical affair. I guess to me it just proved that he had no respect for me.
Thanks for listening to my ramblings. Have a great week.