The latest with me

[ImprovedRomeo]

I'd say today was a good day for me. As over the past several days I got up at 3:30AM and stayed in bed till 6AM trying to go back to sleep but all this stuff weighs on me and I start to feel my heart pulpating, then I just have to get up.

Anyway, started early with the list of things I wanted to do today, a little bit of cleaning, a Home Depot trip to pick up the remaining wood flooring we'd purchased to replace all the carpet, then laundry, then groceries etc. Then a quick lunch.

I talked to DD this morning (wife dials and hands the phone to DD), she sounded sad and said she cried a little bit last night because she wanted to be with me. I told her it was OK and that she was with mommy and mommy loves her and takes care of her just as much as me. Then I texted my STBXW asking her to let me know if she wants to do something together with DD today and that I was in and out running errands. She said it was some kid's b.day party so she has to call them to find out what time. That was this morning, now it's 2:30p and nothing. I'm emotionally doing better today and I think it's because I'm preparing myself to be OK if she never comes back. It's hard at times and part of me wants to have her back especially when I see her signs all over the house (house plants, garden in the backyard, her vegan food stuff). It's interesting that I always think of the fun memories with her, unlike her who only remembers the arguments. My biggest sorrow is my DD but like my friend said to me in an email "Yeah I know it sucks but what can you do? She didn't leave you any other options"

Anyway, we'll see how the rest of the day ends but the first half was great. Last night watched 'Seven Pounds' starring Will Smith...not the best movie to watch in this situation but it was already in the netflix queue lol

Anyone have any good movie suggestions? I'm thinking Clint Eastwood, Jet Li sort of movies might be good to watch these days