Another thing to keep in mind is you tip toed around your H's moods, sleep issues, complicated diet and what sounds like his every whim for a long time. You don't have to do that anymore.
In a way, because you did do that for so long he *might* think it is possible to have it all because you accommodated him for many years. He knows you want to reconcile and therefore is asking way too much of you without much fear you will say no, sorry, I live life for me and my children now.
This will require a HUGE shift in your thinking but probably a necessary one.
