Husband left me 3 months pregnant...

[Piano]

I am so glad to have found a group who is going through a very similar situation to me. I have searched online for a long time and finally I found a group of long relationships, pregnancy, upper 20s-early 30s, and abandonment.

I'm sorry you are here Gatsby...your story is heartbreakingly familiar... I too hope we can offer each other support and help. Have you started an individual thread in Newcommers? It would be good to read the details of how you got here, how we can help... When is your baby due?

But I would console myself with the truth that his feelings didn't actually change before being served and after. It's also my belief that his feelings won't change based on what you do in response

You said it, Gatsby. It's just a question of whether Babydoll, you can wait this out? I'm still convinced there is an OW. It's a bit bizarre, because he's living with his parents...not the best place to conduct an A from.

Given this is all so sudden and 'overnight' (from the bomb to being served) you still need time to heal and grieve until you are strong enough and confident enough about a life with or without him to make your decision.

He was diagnosed with an adjustment disorder. I don't see why your husbands may not be going through the same thing-- an excessive reaction to the news of the pregnancy.

Never heard of that disorder, but will look it up, and it immidiately smacks of what we're going through... You know, it's so sad.. so many IC just seem to validate the WS's fantasies .... So, how did your H react to this diagnosis???

(One difference between your husbands and mine is that mine still has not accepted the child yet-- he is not sure he wants to be in her life except financially.)

I guess it's how you define acceptance.

(I'm at the place now where I am focusing on myself.

Yes, I am there too. It's a slow process, isn't it?

Last thing-- I am exploring divorce and will probably pursue it. I think it's important to get child support in order by the time she arrives.

Why so fast? I am not in the USA, but I've heard about 'legal separation' on these boards. Would that give you the support you need?

Again, start your own thread so we don't hijack Babydoll's space It would be great to know more about your situation, and there are good people on here who can offer you advice.