This is why I love you all to pieces...Email has been scrapped...I don't owe the "giant jerkwad" any consideration...Texts and emails will be ignored or forwarded to my lawyer...Calls won't be answered...See that...Part of the new me in control of my life and no one telling me how to live it...Part of the old me seeking the help of loved ones...I hope you all are blessed today! Thank you bunches!!
May All Who Seek To Take My Life Be Put To Shame And Confusion; May All Who Desire My Ruin Be Turned Back In Disgrace. ~Psalm 40:14~
Are you wearing your heels this morning? I am! What a difference in my PMA.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
SD, Excellent post. Sage advice. I particularly like this
Originally Posted By: SDFoundGirl
just ignore the phone calls and voicemails BECAUSE THEY'RE NOT ABOUT YOU, THEY'RE ABOUT HIM. Turn over anything threatening or abusive to your lawyer, because he will know how to use it to back him off or at least use it to your advantage to get what you want.
And of course, this:
Originally Posted By: SDFoundGirl
And when your H acts like who he is (AKA, a giant jerkwad)
was pretty damn funny, too.
Gardener
"My soul, be satisfied with flowers, With fruit, with weeds even; but gather them In the one garden you may call your own." Cyrano deBergerac
I did indeed let H know I was moving forward with a divorce - I didn't give any demands, just the heads up...
So since Saturday when I dropped that on him this is what I have heard...
He won't be giving me a dime no matter what and I should be prepared to front at least 4 grand to a lawyer...
He didn't abandon us - I abandoned him...
Him having one son and me having the other equals out so neither should have to put up any child support...
When he did leave, he gave me a heads up...
He has never loved me...
I am a chitty Mom...
I never made him happy and I was just there until something better came along (ok this one stung a little)...
My Fav - He never cheated on me with anyone...
Now during the course of the texts and calls, I kept my cool...I said "I am sorry you feel that way" at least a hundred and sixty times it seemed. However I did get pissed off when he started talking about our youngest S and maybe not seeing him until summer...
When I mentioned the OW by name, he had the balls to say "I don't know who you are talking about"...
Once that statement left his mouth, I felt like I was thrown into an episode of the Twilight Zone...
I sat there with him yakking in my ear and I held the phone out, looked at it and asked myself WTF?
Then he played the sympathy card about how he probably won't be alive by the end of the year...
How could I want to do this to him etc...
I had to end the conversation before I reached through the phone and smacked him upside his head.
Cut to last night...He texts me and wants to know my terms for his freedom...I didn't lay out anything as cut and dry however he started with his retirement and spousal support - Told me if I was seeking either one, he would send the Security Police to my house to confiscate my ID card and if that happened, I would also lose my health and dental (tied into my ID card)...
Then proceeded to trying to blackmail me with - If I leave his retirement alone and I don't seek spousal support, he will "allow" me to keep my health/dental benefits.
I ended that conversation with "I will get back to you"...
So as of today - That is where we are.
May All Who Seek To Take My Life Be Put To Shame And Confusion; May All Who Desire My Ruin Be Turned Back In Disgrace. ~Psalm 40:14~
Cut to last night...He texts me and wants to know my terms for his freedom...I didn't lay out anything as cut and dry however he started with his retirement and spousal support - Told me if I was seeking either one, he would send the Security Police to my house to confiscate my ID card and if that happened, I would also lose my health and dental (tied into my ID card)...
He's trying to baffle you with BS. The SPs can't do any of that. Stop taking his calls unless it is related to the boys.
This is why you need a L.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
What's next, white before Easter, or after Labor Day?