Starting Over (Again)

[Cautious]

Okay, so a small recap of today and then bed. I am just too tired tonight to set goals or anything else.

School stuff, awkward after school gathering. No fun. Took S5 to Ex's for the weekend. Ex asked to step inside the car for a minute to get out of the rain. Tried initiating conversation, I resisted.

Possible backslide?: Ex asked why I seemed angry (I wasn't trying to seem angry, but an ambush is going to make me anxious). Asked if I was angry with him, I responded "I am beyond angry with you" He responded "Okay."

Just okay. Nothing more, nothing less. I don't even know whether to chalk that up as moving forward or moving back. The scoreboard is totally confused right now. I know I shouldn't be keeping score or whatnot, but I need to gauge my progress somehow.

So I just let it drop, promised to call S5 at 8 and left. Yay, way to go? I'm still not sure.

BFF's birthday was today, so we went out to dinner then to the casino. Called S5 as promised, Ex avoided all conversation with me. This bothered me in a way, but I need to let it go too. Played penny slots for a couple hours and decided to leave. Now here I am, lost and confused about Ex. Am I getting under that skin or did I mess up again?

Time for sleep, set more goals tomorrow.